Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Letter from Mama, v33

Fall makes me so nostalgic. It truly reminds me of high school, and it makes me ache for the simplicity of that season of my life. I love to listen to country music and remember bonfires, football games, dressing up for school activities, and being home. I know the same goes for your aunties, too, the girls I grew up with. We love to swap remembers with each other, and quiz each other on our 15-year-old selves. I perceive September as the real New Year's with its promise of everything new as summer leads itself to fall. There's such promise and wide open space for beginning again. You and I went to Target on Sunday morning, and quiet and spacious, I took you through the aisles of school supplies- showing you the things I would buy today. I love it. In three months, you'll be three years old. That went so fast. In three years from today, you'll be my big kindergartner, with brand new Nikes on and a backpack full of Mama's Target love. I'll lose sleep in August because I know how much you'll love it and how proud you'll make me. I'll have to face you experiencing things and handling life all on your own. How weird to think I won't be there to see you raise your hand, or help a classmate. My nostalgia will be in hyper-drive.

Speaking of country music, there are two particular songs on the radio currently that make me think of you. Anything Like Me by Brad Paisley is one. He sings about having a son, and wondering and reveling in how he'll be like him as he grows into a person. If you're anything like me, you'll have a crazy-scary memory and longing for your Grandma's. You'll love your handwriting and won't eat the crust of any pie, sandwich, or pizza. You'll have more casts, stitches, and surgeries than most boys. You'll like your water with lemon, and your beer out of a bottle. You'll love the music in your car way too loud, and carrying 11 lipglosses in your bag. You'll love Christmas your whole life, and wear hoodies until the cuffs fray away. If you're anything like me, you'll love buying old junk, and you'll make friends pretty quick. You'll read over 50 books a year, and write lists out like mad. You'll love your Mama's cooking and your Daddy's stories. You'll wear your heart on your sleeve, and cry when other people do. You'll grow into the very best woman who will always, always make her Mama proud. If you're anything like me.

The other song is by Taylor Swift, called Mine. The premise of the song is about finding the courage to rewrite history and give into love. It resonates with me because of one line, and one line only; You are the best thing that’s ever been mine. It's true. I've put my name on a lot of things in this world, but none compare to being your mother. I constantly thank my lucky stars for this opportunity trusted upon me.

Mama loves.

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