Monday, November 30, 2009

A Girl in the Pines


"Teaching children about the natural world should be seen as one of the most important events in their lives." -Thomas Berry


When my brother and I were kids, the vacations we took were the ones we could reach in the silver Ford Taurus wagon. We saw the Black Hills, Mount Rushmore, the Corn Palace, The Mississippi Headwaters, Wisconsin Dells, The Rocky Mountains, Wall Drug, Lake Superior, Lake Michigan, and the Boundary Waters Canoe Area. In other words, we were typical Midwesterners. Of any of these memories, the BWCA family camping trips stick out in my mind as the best. My Dad encouraged both of us to keep journals- I couldn't have been more than seven years old when I began writing in my cloth-bound book, citing such events as, "saw big moose turds, a bald eagle, and ate pancakes for supper," but the act of observing and writing nature around us was so simple and inspiring. On those trips- there was no electricity. No TV, phones, handheld gaming devices, elaborate toys. It was kid, dirt, water, rocks, sunshine. I'm grateful for that influence in my life- and today, as a mother myself, I am fully appreciating what my Dad encouraged in me all those years ago.


Friday afternoon we packed up the lil' dude and dog and headed for the woods- to the 80 acres my Dad's pride and joy is- to the little log cabin nestled amongst the big trees. There- like the days spent on the shores of Kawishiwi Lake as a child, I smell my sleeve recognizing the scent of firewood, read books by the lantern light, construct puzzles on the floor, listen to guitar music, polka for breakfast, and snack on popcorn and cocoa before sleep. And true to form, there sits a cabin journal, encouraging guests to write about who they are, what they did, what they saw, encounters they made while on their visit. I took the journal to the front porch in the morning, steaming cup of coffee in hand, and remembered everything.


And the lil' dude? Loved every minute spent at her Papa's cabin- and we were completely unplugged. There isn't even any running water! She slept all night in between Daddy and Mama- stretched out in a giant X, arms splayed across both pillows. When she opened her eyes Saturday morning, she looked out the window, taking in her surroundings, she saw the four-wheeler. RIDE! she squealed, so out they went. We are so lucky to have no reason to not get out into the woods- where decades and decades and tradition will be spent making the best of memories.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Thankful

I am thankful for the time I take to remember and appreciate Thanksgiving as a holiday, for helping the lil' dude with related crafts and stories and tradition. Christmas can wait.

I am thankful for my mother's wherewithal to preserve so many boxes from my childhood. Just last week I opened a box containing my very first baby doll and my eyes welled up.

I am thankful for my husband's work ethic, which he inherited from his very hardworking parents. What an amazing trait.

I am thankful someone is helping me make gravy today.

I am thankful for my daughter's legs which she uses to run run run and never stop.

I am thankful for the Beagle's unflagging patience in regards to constant rough, {nearly} two-year-old love and affection.

I am thankful for two decades' worth of friendship with simply phenomenal women, who will always be my 'girls'.

I am thankful for the two wonderful matriarchs of our families; the lil' dude's great-grandmothers who are strong, independent, sincere, sweet, honest women. They both are such great role models for my daughter, and we are blessed.

I am thankful for music; all the old songs I love, and the new gems I find.

I am thankful for library books.

I am thankful for today.
For always.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Monday, November 23, 2009

Of What You Dream

I'll admit, last night was more about me than you.

Just after midnight, you began to talk/cry/whimper in your sleep. This lasted nearly an hour, even after Daddy checked on you and rubbed your back ... calming and quieting you.

But you started up again, your tiny sounds so agonizing. You were asleep, but must have had a big ol' scenario going on in your tired brain. You were mumbling about Daddy sleeping, and the Beagle sleeping, so shhhh-shhhh, quiet, you kept whispering. You weren't at peace in the darkness, honey.

So, instinctively I scooped you up and headed to the recliner in the dark and rocked you.

You calmed down and fell quietly asleep.

Except, one time after nearly 20 minutes, you sat up, looked me in the eye, and said, Daddy, Coffee.

Which is goofy, since coffee's not Daddy's thing.

But I stifled my giggles. Because I know my dreams never make sense.

So thank you, sweet girl, for letting me be there for you last night.
Nights like those are so rare. I'll take 'em where I can get 'em!

Mama loves.

One of my favorite sleeping pictures of you!

Friday, November 20, 2009

Missing

Last night, when I walked in the door from being away from home for exactly 24 hours ... you flew at me in a frenzy, catapulting your tiny body down the stairs, and into my arms.
It knocked me over, literally, and figuratively.
You surprised me.
You hugged, you squealed, you petted, and you cooed.

Mama home! Mama back! MamaMamaMama!
Oh, sweet girl, how you do a world of good, even on some of the darkest days.

I've always been proud and a bit boastful of your easygoing-ness. How you've never really cried when I've left you, or acted scared to be away from me. Sure- as your mother I'd feel a small pang of really, child? Can you not show some remorse as I'm leaving, show me you love me? But here, after all, and all along, you've shown me that. If you love something, you let it go. You let her go. And she'll come back.

You watched me like a hawk last night, and I didn't leave your sight much. You fell and got hurt, and I was there to pick you up and you wrapped your arms around my neck so tight. You were so quiet, you had your father concerned ... our little jabberbox silenced. Your heart beat in a steady rupruprup against mine. Back to you, back to me, back to us.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

You ...

You are ... nearly two years old!
You want ... to be independent.
You wish ... you could watch movies 24/7.
You hate ... being woken up.
You miss ... your mouth when drinking from a regular cup.
You fear ... dead worms on the driveway.
You feel ... like my tiny newborn every so often.
You hear ... supernaturally, nothing gets past you.
You smell ... like Aveeno.
You crave ... grapes.
You search ... for Marty & Melman in your bed each morning.
You wonder ... where Daddy is when I wake you up.
You regret ... acting inappropriately when we ask you to apologize.
You ache ... when you bonk your head on the furniture.
You care ... about order and appearance of your things.
You always ... will be my baby.
You are not ... afraid.
You believe ... Daddy can do anything.
You dance ... when we say 'shake your booty'.
You sing ... the instrumental theme song to The Young & The Restless.
You cry ... when you're pushed to your limit.
You don't ... act like a baby much anymore.
You fight ... getting your nose wiped.
You write ... in brown crayon on the dining room linoleum.
You never ... knew how much you could change two people.
You listen ... to at least one of the same books each night at bedtime.
You need ... your NaNa to be by your face/head when you sleep.
You are happy ... When you're home with your people, and things.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009